The holiday season can feel overwhelming for the average American. We sat down with Ashley Dailey, a family support navigator for Prevention Network, to bring you this article. According to Ashley “78% of Americans claim they find the holidays stressful.” So what about for people who are grieving a loss? It could be recent, or years past, regardless; the holidays can bring up difficult memories and emotions. 

Ashley shared some tips for coping with grief during the holidays:

1. Create a new tradition

Creating a tradition to honor your lost loved one. A new tradition could include a lot of things; cooking a new dish that was your loved one’s favorite, creating a list of your favorite memories with that person and sharing them as a family, or play a new game every holiday that they loved. 

2. Give yourself permission to say “no”

The holidays may come with feelings of obligation. Remember, however, that it is okay to say no and do what you need to for yourself. If something feels too overwhelming, maybe say “I’m sorry but that’s too much for me.”

3. Do something for others

Giving to others can provide some relief to a grieving heart, especially when it is done so in a way that is honoring a lost loved one. A local example is “Angel Stockings,” a holiday tradition orchestrated by Prevention Network, in which parents who have lost a child stuff stockings that get delivered to people in recovery. Often parents miss stuffing their kids’ stocking so they can fill it with things their child liked, such as a favorite candy. It is a way to show support in hope that someone in recovery will feel supported and perhaps more motivated to know someone is grieving with them. Other activities could involve volunteering at a soup kitchen.

4. Express your feelings

Pushing down sad feelings only makes grieving harder. One way to cope is to talk about the person you miss and what you are feeling. This can be with loved ones, grief support groups, or with a therapist. 

5. Rest or practice self-care

Resting and self-care is a really important aspect of coping with grief. Self-care looks different for everyone, but it could include going for a walk, taking a bubble bath, or taking an afternoon to lay on the couch watching your favorite show. 

Although the holidays are “supposed” to be a happy time, they can also be a time of grieving and sadness. If you or a loved one is grieving this holiday season, maybe try out one of these tips to help cope with grief. 

Ashley Dailey is a Family Support Navigator for Prevention Network, a treatment and recovery center based in Syracuse. Her expertise is helping family members navigate their relationship in support of loved ones who are in recovery. She also works with clients in Cortland County.